By Dori Lumpkin

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One Night with Jade Evanson, Lead Singer of Messy/Punk, at the Infamous Rusty Screw Lounge

In the first-ever tell-all interview, the lead singer of one of the most popular and dangerous punk bands finally comes clean about her inspirations, her bandmates, and how she really feels about that one blood experiment.

By Heather Wyatt

It’s no secret that everyone in Los Angeles has a crush on Jade Evanson. Her allure is undeniable, and everything from the way that she dresses to the smile on her face seems desperate to prove that. Her band, Messy/Punk, is new on the scene, but she remains unafraid. Something about the passion of the fans keeps her hope alive, she says. There’s not a single thing in the world that could possibly bother her. She (and the rest of her band) is young and untouchable.

Admittedly, I was never much of a fan of her style of music. It was always too loud, too meaningless. I assumed that if the artists actually wanted me to understand and appreciate what they were saying, they would enunciate better. Jade directly challenges this. The lyrics she and her bandmates write are undoubtedly disgusting, but there’s a particular edge to them that keeps people coming back. Before this interview, I was eager to find out exactly what created that sort of allure. Now I’m not sure that I care.

Jade strolls into the lounge three hours early with her leather jacket on and what could barely pass as a shirt underneath, and immediately takes a seat at the bar. The bartender tells me she does this every time they play at the Rusty Screw. They’re friends now. She likes to feel comfortable in the venue, like she belongs there. Her shows are undoubtedly an uncomfortable space — she seems to be all-too-aware of this, so she apparently likes to keep the staff well-taken-care of.

Not that they mind.

She runs a hand through her hair and looks at me, raises an eyebrow, and says that we might as well get going, or else I’ll run out of time before the show even starts.

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What are you drinking?

Fuck if I know. [She swirls it around, looking at it as if trying to figure out what the drink contains.] I know there’s whiskey in here. And ginger? Sam [the bartender] likes to mix it up for me sometimes.

That’s bold. Your drink of choice?

[She laughs, but it’s cold.] My drink of choice. I don’t even know what the hell it is, how could it be my drink of choice? Are you going to ask me any real questions, or is this all going to be bullshit flirting small-talk?

Alright sure, let’s get into it. You and your band have a very specific and carefully curated image. What inspires that?

I didn’t realize it was so carefully curated. We don’t usually try to do that sort of shit. I mean fuck, it takes a village just to get Tasha to shower. Do we have an image?

Sure, the whole punk thing. The controversy and leather jackets and drinking blood on stage.

[Jade laughs again.] “The whole punk thing”? Babe, that’s just what we do. You don’t do much of this, do you?

I’m not sure what you mean?

Much of interviewing people like me. You don’t really look like the sort of person who would fit into our whole… what’s the word… demographic? You’re too corporate.

So tell me about your demographic, then. Who’s your ideal fan?

Not you, obviously.

How did you get into all of this? Have you always been playing music?

No shit.

You seem a little bit closed off, are you sure you want to have this interview tonight?

No, no, keep going. It’s not my fault you’re asking stupid questions.

Alright, fine. Let’s talk about the album. What’s your favorite track?

Oh “King of Thieves” without question. But I might be the only person who thinks that. I like the drums on that one best, I think they fit with the overall energy of the album, but it took everything we had to get Darcy to agree to the beat.

So, you and your bandmates disagree? From what I understand, there was a bit of tension recently.

 We all fucking hate each other. [We both pause. She smiles, as if there’s a joke that I’m not in on] No, we don’t. I mean, we’re all different fucking people, right. Like I said before, Tasha doesn’t shower, and we all hate her for that. Hollis brings a new person over every night which makes it impossible to actually get work done. Darcy’s a cunt, just in general, and Esme can’t string two thoughts together to save her fucking life. Yeah, we all disagree on shit. Yeah, there’s fucking tension, why wouldn’t there be? But we’re not gonna fucking kill each other, you know? At the end of the day, we’re a team. We get shit done. Who cares if we don’t agree which song is the best song on the album? Other things matter more than that, I think.

What about you? You listed everyone else’s issues, but not your own. Are you perfect or something?

Of course I’m perfect babe, don’t be stupid. Next question.

Okay… Tell me about your band’s name. It’s an odd choice. A little bit on-the-nose. Why?

We’re not trying to hide anything. I mean, you’ve got bands out there literally called “Death” and “Agent Orange.” It’s not really in our nature to perform under false pretenses by calling the band like… Magic Pixie Dust Unicorn Supreme. We’re messy, and we’re a punk band. It seemed simple enough. Besides, who gives a fuck about the notoriety or the band name or anything like that? We could call every track “fifth song” or whatever the fuck we wanted and it wouldn’t matter. We’re not in it for that.

What do you do this for, then?

Don’t get me wrong, the notoriety is pretty fucking sick. Performing live though… That’s everything. That’s what we’re here for.

Live music over everything? Really?

Yeah, god, getting up on stage and feeling the energy of a crowd before you? Literally nothing like it. It’s a new form of worship, I think. Being above everyone and having them hang onto your every word? Brilliant.

Worship? I thought your whole image was anti-religion.

Worship and religion are two different things, babe. And it’s not religion as a whole. Just organized religion. I think we liken celebrities to gods, don’t you? At least, when they’re big enough.

You’re not quite there yet, though.

No, not yet. But we can make it work. It sort of feels like a religion thing, doesn’t it? A song is a message, and going so far as to see that song performed live, that message delivered the way it was meant to be? It’s holy. There’s something energizing about it.

You’re just tricking your fans into going to church.

If that’s how you want to think of it, I guess so.

Was that the inspiration for the album? Church?

I mean, I guess. More so that idea I was talking about before, the whole celebrities likening to gods and doing whatever we want thing. Obviously, it has to be a little bit about the music, but at the end of the day, it isn’t about the music in totality. The whole album exists to convince people that we can really do whatever the fuck we want, and the audience is the one who lets us get away with it.

You really think you can get away with anything?

Is that something you have a problem with?

No… I guess not. [We both pause.] I guess we should talk about the blood thing, then.

One month before this scheduled interview and before their sold out five nights at the Rusty Screw, Messy/Punk got in trouble onstage for what the media has been calling “gross misconduct” and “satanic behavior”. About halfway through their set, between the songs “Fuck Baby” and “Graveyard”, band member and bassist Hollis Hayworth walked towards the front of the stage and picked up a small bucket filled with what is now believed to be pig’s blood. She emptied the bucket atop Jade’s head, in an act that resembled the climactic scene of Stephen King’s “Carrie”. As a response to Hayworth’s actions, Jade merely laughed and told Hollis that “human blood would have tasted better.” Since this event occurred, many social groups have begun boycotting or directly speaking out against Messy/Punk, specifically concerned parents who have found that their children have a fondness for the music. “It’s just evil!” One mother said, referring to the track “Bite Me First” from their self-titled album. “I can’t imagine what their parents must think, though I suppose children like that don’t usually have parents who care about them, do they?”

[Jade laughs again, but there’s something underneath it that rings strange to me. She’s laughed many times throughout this interview, but none of it has felt quite so mocking. Part of me feels uncomfortable, but also drawn in. I wonder if that’s what she wants from me.]

I mean, what is there to say about the “blood thing”, if that’s what we’re calling it? Hollis is a huge horror fan, we just wanted to have a little bit of fun on stage. Everyone who was there loved it. I think that maybe if it had been a closed concert hall, like if we had made the audience sign NDA’s or some shit, then maybe it would have been an awesome time. The only reason we got in trouble was because some asswipe got scared and called mommy on us. I don’t regret a single moment of it. Except maybe the shower afterward.

Do you have anything you’ve done in your career that you do regret?

Should I? I guess my career is pretty short, I’m only 22. There’s plenty of time to regret things, you know? I’m just not really in the business for it right now. My reputation doesn’t exactly lend itself to regrets, anyway. I just kinda do whatever. Haven’t you been listening? I could gut someone on stage and people would cry tears of joy and talk about it until the end of time. And the funny thing is, that isn’t what I would be known for. They’d still talk about how great I am, how beautiful we look up there and the message we’re sending at the end of the day. The person wouldn’t even fucking matter, because my reputation would be worth more than just that.

Say more, please… How do you feel about your reputation?

How would you describe my reputation? In order for me to fully answer that question, I should know what you think of me, don’t you agree?

We should circle back, I’m not comfortable with sharing where I stand on the matter, and the interview is for you. Not me.

What’s making you uncomfortable? All I’ve been doing is answering your questions. Don’t say you’re afraid of me or some bullshit.

No. Not afraid. I’m mostly curious.

What are you curious about?

You.

Well, you’re in the perfect fucking position for that, aren’t you? Elaborate.

I think people like you for no reason. That intrigues me. You aren’t really my style, which you nailed a little bit earlier, but for some reason I’m drawn to you. I think most people probably feel similarly, even the ones who listened to your genre of music before they discovered you as a group. I want to know why that is. I don’t believe you’re terribly talented, I mean, you’re fine, but not really enough to actually go anywhere huge. You’re an attractive group of people, but you’ve got many, many flaws. You don’t seem to give a shit about the audience, you admittedly don’t shower, and your personalities are kind of rancid. I can’t figure out why you’re so damn popular. It bothers me.

[She glares at me for a moment. Just a moment. And then it passes, and she smiles again.]

Why did you accept this interview? Seems like you’re not too keen on my band, or exactly what it is we do.

Do you want my honest answer?

[She moves closer to me, our hands almost touching.]

Of course I want you to be honest.

It was a business decision. I thought it would be good for my career. You’re fresh, obviously people like you. You’re clearly going far in the industry, whether I think you should or not.  It was a smart choice, and it puts me in a position to profile other musicians down the road. Nothing personal.

Ah, so it was completely corporate. I feel a little vindicated here. [We pause. She regards me, and I am a bug under her microscope.] Has your opinion of me and my band changed at all since we started?

Maybe.

Just maybe?

I’m still finding myself drawn to you, and I can’t really explain why. It’s the same thing I was talking about before, with people following you and you admitting that you can do whatever the hell you want and people won’t say shit to you about it. Before this conversation, I listened to about enough of your music to allow me to talk to you about it and not sound like an idiot. Now, I want to go home and listen to every track. It’s a little infuriating, honestly. You’re not my type, this isn’t my scene, and yet I’m still here. I still accepted the job despite every bone in my body telling me that it might not be worth it. You’ve been keeping me in conversation despite giving me non-answers and shifting around the questions. I don’t even know how long it’s been since we started talking, but also? I don’t really care. I’m confused. But I like you. Part of me does, at least. I don’t know what that looks like or why it exists, but that’s the case.

Then I’m winning, aren’t I?

Winning?

I got what I wanted.

What did you want?

Wasn’t it obvious this whole time? Haven’t you been listening? You’d sit here and let me do whatever I wanted just for a good story. You’re the same as any of them. And that’s perfect.

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Jade didn’t offer any more information past that. She got up, kissed me on the cheek, and told me to enjoy the show. There would be something special about halfway through, and she wanted me to look out for it. The rest of the band arrived shortly after our interview ended, and I didn’t bother asking them to comment. They didn’t seem like they wanted to.

I did enjoy the show, by the end of the night. That was the odd thing. Bullshit or not, Jade’s charisma is remarkable, and the way she draws in a crowd is near-flawless. The songs themselves could use some work, but I can see the potential, where I couldn’t before. I’m not sure if it’s because of my closeness to the subject, or because my mind truly has changed, but either way, it exists.

Something did occur at the halfway mark of the show though, and it would be stupid of me not to mention it. Mid-song, during the bridge of “Beulah’s Basement,” there was a shift in the lighting. I’m not sure if it was intentional, though based on Jade’s comments, it must’ve been, but either way it was strange. The lights dimmed, covering Jade in a wash of dark red. It called back to the original blood incident. She was grinning, and for a second, she wasn’t human. Her body was covered in gore, viscera, and all things unnatural. Her jaw split in half and opened up to embrace the crowd.

Everyone remained cheering, impossibly delighted by the display.

The lights flickered again, and we were back to where we were before, worshiping her as if we were always meant to.

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Dori Lumpkin is a queer writer and storytelling enthusiast from South Alabama. Their work has appeared in The Deeps, Crow & Cross Keys, and Demons & Death Drops, (amongst others). They love all things speculative and weird, and strive to make fiction writing a more inclusive place. You can find them @whimsyqueen on most social media websites, or check out their website: https://dorilumpkin.carrd.co/

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